It’s an odd place to get parenting advice, but the best story regarding mothering I ever heard was from Penn Jillette on Marc Maron’s podcast WTF. Penn talked about how his mother’s philosophy was that she loved and cherished her children for who they were, from the moment of birth, and never for what they did. She delighted in their joys, but it was never about accomplishments.
According to Penn, she was once offended by a producer who asked her if she were proud of her son for receiving a positive New York Times review. She was horrified at the suggestion and put him in his place by affirming it was not his accomplishments that made her proud, but who he was and had always been. That’s the kind of mom I want to be.
Like Mrs. Jillette, I hope to be secure and self-assured enough to say honestly to my child, “There is nothing you need to do or be to make my life more complete. My greatest joy is just to experience you being you.” I want to keep my child safe and teach her what I can. But I need to let go of my own expectations and not dictate the direction of her life. It’s not about me. It is her life.
(read the rest at: http://newapproachesme.com/archives/hopes-for-myself-as-a-mother)